Self-doubt is defined as a lack of faith in oneself. In psychology, self-doubt is a feeling of uncertainty about one's thoughts or actions.
This article is to provide insights about self-doubt. To truly master self-doubt, here are four underlying root causes we would want to understand and address.
1. Out of our comfort zone
Self-doubt is a state in which we are out of our comfort zone.
Being out of our comfort zone puts us in the fear zone towards the growth zone. And growth is bound to be uncomfortable; we know this.
But what most of us do not know is that self-doubt is neither a positive nor a negative feeling.
To put it in perspective, when we look beyond our own, we can see that:
Some perceive their self-doubt as an opportunity to improve, which eventually drives their growth. They are the ones who keep making gradual progress.
Some perceive their self-doubt as a detriment, and they are therefore seeking comfort or pleasure to negate it. They are those whose life circumstances repeat.
Intrinsically, it is our choice to give our own self-doubt a good or bad label.
Realise that in the process of doing things that grow us, self-doubt is part of what we are supposed to feel, preparing us to be more resilient for what is yet to come.
It’s not the self-doubt; it’s how we react to the self-doubt.
Key action
Being out of your comfort zone is beneficial; the key is to embrace it at your own pace.
Get uncomfortable, but never to the point of being unhealthy or threatening.
If you are uncomfortable, moving forward is the true way.
If you are tired, take a rest to recharge; continue at it later.
2. Lack of understanding
There is a saying that goes: "If you're struggling, you have not failed; you just have not learned it yet."
Self-doubt arises when there is a lack of information about the situation we are in.
We often think we already have the answer, but if we really do, we shall have no doubts, aren't we? Objectively speaking, when we self-doubt, it simply conveys that we have no answer yet.
Self-doubt is a feeling. Like any other form of feeling, it persists. This means it will naturally come back, and every time it does, it is an invitation to attain the answer (truth) about the current matter.
In the event of self-doubt, it is not the time to fight or flight; rather, it is the time to understand (comprehend and acquire).
Frame self-doubt as: What does life try to teach us now?
Because humans, by nature, are very afraid of what they do not understand. Which is why, once we do understand, fear in the form of self-doubt goes away.
Key action
It is good to ask yourself more thought-provoking questions; the more you ask, the more curiously driven you will be to find out.
The more you learn ahead of time, the better equipped you are to confront self-doubt.
For the sole reason that understanding is very, very powerful. What it does is open paths for you to navigate forward.
3. Our circle matter
Our self-doubt is, to a great degree, dependent on those around us, and here is why:
When we are surrounded by supportive, optimistic people, our self-doubt will tend to lead to good resolve and revelation.
When we surround ourselves with judgmental, pessimistic people, our self-doubt will tend to lead to self-destruction or at the expense of theirs.
Our circle matters. It encompasses the individuals we choose to surround ourselves with and the environment in which we place ourselves.
There are always two sides to a story. Hard work and perseverance are essential, as are the right platform and opportunities.
We need others to provide us with the right platform and opportunities so that we may work hard and persevere. Truly, no one can do it alone.
We are not implying that we should point our finger at others for our shortcomings; rather, we are signifying that we take accountability for who we choose to form relationships with.
Form meaningful relationships with the right people.
Recognise that, in time, the people around us can either lift us up or tear us down.
Key action
With the support of the right people, your inevitable self-doubt can fuel you further in the right direction.
Be wise with who and where you put yourself. Ultimately, your circle is your accountability.
Reshape your circle by spending more time with the right people and less time with those who are not.
4. Self-esteem has not been built
A person's self-esteem has a lot to do with who they are (identity).
Who they are (identity) has a lot to do with what they do.
In essence, self-esteem is built through what we do. The more we do something, from being terrible at it to decent to good to great, the process is what gradually gains us true self-esteem.
When someone gains self-esteem from what they do, it certainly feels like their deep subconscious mind acknowledges that they are good at something, and such a feeling is vital to counteracting self-doubt.
When thinking about it, a person who has high self-esteem appears evident in various aspects of their lives, for it is naturally displayed and cannot be concealed. Do they ever have self-doubt? They surely have, but not for long as they channel it towards betterment at what they do.
At heart, fulfilment is what we all want.
Self-doubt, as a feeling, is our body's way of telling us to build self-esteem by doing something. In other words, self-doubt is a reflection of our longing for fulfilment.
Key action
No one but you knows what fulfilment you long for. So, be sincere; ask your inner self what you really, really desire to do.
Use the mindset of building it. Dedicate to building that desire persistently and consistently. Enjoy yourself, and give it time.
In the continuance of building that one desire for greatness, when self-doubt finds you again, you will know and feel that:
Self-doubt with self-esteem is just a whole lot different from self-doubt without.
In summary
